I wish.

Yo.

Today was a fun packed day of school. And then drama which actually was fun packed!!! :D Paha, we played holy ??? Ahh, cant think of the second word! :L But yeah its basically this game where you all sit in a circle and someone is elected president and then theres also a vise president and they just literally tell everybody what to do!! And you have to ask if you want to move and stuff, sounds weird but its very fun and HILARIOUS :') cuz you have punishments and stuff and yeah its a goooood game! :D Reason for the title is just i seriously spend to much of my important time ;) wishing i was better. Like honestly i find a floor in everything i do! And you little readers (emma) ;) are probably sitting there thinking argh shes just trying to be attention seeking, she just wants people to sympathise with her and tell her she's great and feel sorry for her! But that really isnt it. I just i dunno because im not clever, im just not. I know im not, and because im not exactly the prettiest person you'll ever see!! ;) I just find floors in everything, and compare myself to everyone else! Especially my friends, like Jess is so gorgeous so's Sas, so's Emma and there all sooooo clever! Like every single one of my friends is like amazingly clever, no joke :P so i dunno compared to them i just feel so dumb and shit :/ and whenever i try to look nice or seem clever someone else always beats me!! ;) or calls me ugly or says im freaky!! :( So yeah, because of all these reasons i just spend a lot of my time worrying and i just have no self esteem, well no thats not true, cuz im a really loud confident person like i do a lot of drama and im alright at that and im really really loud and speak the truth!! ;) So i guess i do have self esteem but i just dont with some things!! And i just dont want to be like I WISH anymore, cuz i know it doesnt do anything :/ i dont wanna have to be all paranoid about things but i am! Haaa, this is so random but ive been thinking about this a lot latley so i thought id write it down ;) But i think ive actually realised that theres no reason to be like i wish i was clever, i wish i was pretty anymore because i cant change what im like! Okay from now on i will stop stop stop stopppppppp with all this stupidness cuz whatever i do im never gunna be able to change things! I just always seem to be wanting to be like other people but ahhh theres just no point! I really just need to try and be happy :) Haha, hope you enjoyed this random outburst of my problems!! Sorry this is so weird, but my day was boring so i thought id blog about something different for a change ;) Ooooh and hope you like the pic :D i took it ageesss ago in waterstones before my camera broke! Aha, that book is immense ;D i remember reading it loads when i was little :')
Anywho, post tomorrow. Later.